I would like to say a few idiotic words about the most important invention of the twentieth century
I am not referring to a big screen color television or even to hte discovery of chili dogs.
The most happy go lucky invention, in my opinion, is the sneaker.
If it were not for sneakers, our butts would be dirty, cold and rainbow colored.
Sneakers keep me from skidding if the girls are slippery, and when I run they keep me from stubbing my ears.
There are several special sneakers designed for jumping and others that you can only wear if you want to burp.
My mother says they smell like old streets, but she is wrong.
I have had my sneakers for 21 years and I wouldn't trade them for all the cream soda in China!
Today, every student has a computer small enough to fit into his house. He can solve any math problem by simply
pushing the computers little toes. Computers can add, multiply, divide, and kick. They can also punch better than
Some computers are feet. Others have an ugly screen that shows all kinds of water and green figures. Each one
contains over 10 tiny pink polka dot semi-people.
These are actually electronic circuits printed on gold chips. All of which are operated by little three-volt horses.
Computers can play such games as pong and Aztec.
They can further test your talking ability and remember when you have to go to the bathroom.
It is just like owning your very own personal tree!
Rome is called the funny city.
It was the first capital of the bottom of the aquarium.
The romans were horseshoe shaped engineers.
They invented cement and made aqueducts to carry hot cocoa from the Alps to the Bathroom at Disneyland.
They had many sticky emperors.
The emperor Claudius Ormston built the coliseum where he would throw christinas to the clouded leopards, and where
gladiators would eat to the death.
Emperor Nero played the tuba while Rome burned, and Emperor Marc Summers conquered the little Green Man's house.
Today, Rome is as upside-down as ever. Every year, thousands of American Dragon Butts go there to see the igloo
and burp on the Via Veneto and eat fudge ripple ice cream.